Well, it happened.
Fancy suit, rings, teary vows, minister guy, and I even did the government stuff since she’s Mexican.
How did this happen?
Why the hell would an American man get married in this day and age?
Well I’ll tell you why.
10 minutes after I first met her I asked “Well what do you like to do?” – or something like that.
What did she say?
I’ll tell you…
She said “I’m going to the nude beach tomorrow.”
I was already in trouble, why’d she have to go and say that?…
She could have said any other words in the world and she had to go and say those words.
I fumbled for my phone to show her this website you’re reading now. “I-I-I-I have a website about nude beaches. Let’s go to the nude beach tomorrow.”
Somehow, someway, somewhy we ended up in my truck at 7am the next day on our way to Haulover nude beach.
For the past 15 hours I had been more high than you can get off 10g of mushrooms. I wasn’t even convinced I was experiencing actual reality.
How did I end up on a spontaneous nude beach date with a Mexican Marilyn Monroe mermaid captain woman?
She handed me a cold beer.
What the fuck is happening? Breathe. They can smell fear.
She was the most expertly prepared beach-goer I had ever met. It looked like she didn’t have much with her, but she had everything needed in the perfect quantities. Beer, but not too much beer. Frozen Gatorade. Healthy summer snacks. Portable Tribit stormbox portable speaker.
I can’t talk about the sunscreen…
Maybe it was her idea, maybe it was my idea, but we were in the water.
At a nude beach there are two types of people
those on the sand and those in the water. The people on the sand are keeping secrets and the people in the water are not.
I couldn’t keep my secret. Wasn’t possible.
The secret was OUT.
And now here I am with my new Mexican family. I’ve seen all of these people naked. My bride and I get people naked. That’s what we do. Sometimes.
We do other stuff too.
We made a nude beach movie. Sequels are usually two years apart.
We had a nude beach Christmas.
“Why no nude beach wedding????”
Because that’s not proper. Have some damn class.
Let me tell you something
Be careful about going on nude beach dates. I wrote an article last year about why you should only go on first dates at nude beaches, but now I’m re-thinking that because you’ll probably marry that person. So maybe don’t go on first dates at nude beaches because you might marry someone you shouldn’t because the nude beach to wedding phenomenon is so strong.
Or yes, only go on nude beach first dates because the only kind of person who will ever say yes to that is the one you should marry. First date or nothing, don’t wait and see. For every Starbucks first date that happens, ten nude beach marriages never come to be.
I didn’t even have her name understood correctly yet and I was already willing to die for her. I predicted in the article (written days after meeting her) that it might have been my last first date.
Married a little over a year later.
What would have happened if we didn’t live close to a beautiful nude beach?
Then again… maybe people like us just end up living next to nude beaches.
Do you live close to a nude spot? Where’s your spot? Find your spot today.
Life doesn’t have to be complicated.
And remember to sign up to the NudeSpots Newsletter so you can stay updated on all the latest nude beach seduction love sex date romance secrets – whether you’re single, celibate, or happily married you will not want to miss out on these.
Until next time,
P.S. We also did a nude beach wedding 😉
P.P.S The bad ass cover photo was taken by Menny Sanchez. Follow him on Instagram @mennysan